How I Met Yoda


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“Haley, can I borrow your..” I paused, halfway through my sentence, as I entered my room.

“Borrow my what?” Haley asked joining me in my doorway.

I couldn’t answer her. I was more fixated on the buzzing noise that my electric toothbrush was making.

“Ruby? Why didn’t you turn off your electric toothbrush? You know how Mum and Dad get about us wasting power like that.”

I nodded my head. “I could have sworn that I turned it off and it doesn’t usually make that sort of buzzing noise.” When on and not in use, my toothbrush usually made a loud  buzzing sound. This was more of a quiet whirring sound.

“Well, clearly, you did leave it on. Quick!Go turn it off!” My older sister, Haley, always became bossy when giving orders.

I rushed over to my toothbrush. Haley was right, if Mum and Dad thought I had left it on when I wasn’t using it, they wouldn’t be happy and would probably try and make me pay this month’s power bill out of my wages. When you lived with Haley, paying the power bill wasn’t something you wanted to do.

I picked up my toothbrush, glanced at it, then threw Haley a confused look.


  “It’s off. The power switch is flicked to off.”

“It can’t be! It’s buzzing!” Haley told me, as if I was dumb.

“Yes. Thank you for that, Haley,” I shot back, rather sarcastically.

Haley strode across my room and I smirked. She thought she could handle any situation so let’s see how she took care of this one.

Haley snatched the toothbrush from me and I rolled my eyes. Our parents had brought Haley and I up exactly the same and yet I had manners but she didn’t. Haley flicked the off button back and forth but the toothbrush stayed on the whole time. She proceeded to keep flicking the button, but faster.

“Careful, Haley! You’ll break it!”

Haley rolled her eyes at me. “Ruby, it’s clearly already broken.” I blushed in embarrassment. Haley did have a point.

The toothbrush seemed to take on a mind of its own, it started to buzz violently and Haley dropped it in shock. It started to roll furiously back and forth across the floor and we stepped back out of its way, confused as to what was happening.

It suddenly stopped buzzing and I breathed a sigh of relief. I would be throwing that toothbrush out and getting a new one. I didn’t want that to happen to me while I was brushing my teeth.

Haley screamed and I jumped in fright. Looking over at her, I saw the terrified look on her face. She was looking intently at the toothbrush and I turned to focus my gaze back on that, gasping in shock at what I saw.

There was a small arm, like a baby’s, sticking out of my toothbrush. It had split in half down the middle where the toothbrush was held together.

“What the hell is happening?!” I shrieked, not sure if I was talking to Haley or myself.

“I don’t know!” Haley shrieked back.

I suddenly felt sick. Had that arm been in there the whole time I had-had the toothbrush?

Haley and I jumped back away from the toothbrush in unison when the arm began to come all the way out, followed by a second arm, then a head, shoulders and the rest of a body that made up a little man.

He heaved himself out, onto my floor and looked at Haley and I who were staring at him in shock. Surely this couldn’t be real?

“What are you?” Haley broke the silent exchange between the three of us.

“Yoda, I am!” The little man creature boomed in a proud voice.

I gasped, “As in, Yoda, from Star Wars?”

Yoda shook his head and waved his hands furiously at me as if I had said something wrong.

“No! No! Master Yoda that is, my grandfather.”

“Sorry. You just look a lot like him.”

“My grandfather he is, look like him of course I do!” Yoda snapped at me and I blushed furiously. This creature sure had a way of making me feel stupid.

“Are you real?” I asked.

Yoda scoffed, “ask stupid questions, you do. Watch Star Wars, you do?”

I nodded.

“Very real I am then, you know.”

“I’m sorry, I just always thought, your grandfather was animated.”

“What?” Yoda scrunched his nose up at my words. “Animated you speak of, what is?”

“You know, like, a cartoon?”

“Silly you are! Animated my grandfather is not!”

“What are you then?” Haley jumped in. She liked being the centre of attention.

“Said you watch Star Wars, Ruby did.” I didn’t bother to ask how Yoda knew my name.

“We do.”

“My race is not revealed you will know, then.”

“So you don’t know what you are?” Haley asked.

Yoda rolled his eyes, “no one does, just told you I did.”

I was suddenly glad that Haley had been the one to ask a stupid question. Though it wasn’t really a stupid question. One would think that Yoda and his species would know what they were.

“Well, at least we know you are real now,” Haley said.

Yoda smirked. “Thought I wasn’t real, can’t believe you both did.”

“You have to remember that up until Star Wars came about we had never seen anything quite like your grandfather and, apparently, you.” I said.

Yoda shook his head and quickly spoke, “been around longer than humans my species has.”

“Yet, you still don’t know what species you are,” Haley pointed out. I would give Haley that, she was never afraid at the prospect of upsetting people.

“Touchy subject, that is!” Yoda snapped. I felt bad for him, it would be horrible not really knowing what you were.

Yoda met my eye and narrowed his own, “your sympathy I don’t want! Those looks, don’t give me!” I shook my head. Whatever sort of creature Yoda was, he was definitely a grump.

I decided to change the subject. “What are you doing here anyway? Also, how long have you been living in my toothbrush?”

Yoda threw back his head and let out a noise that sounded like a cross between a cat hacking up a fur ball and a human crying. I assumed he was laughing. I wasn’t sure why, I thought my question was a pretty reasonable one.

“You think, live in your toothbrush, Yoda does?”

“That is where you came out of,” Haley pointed out and I nodded.

Yoda shook his head, “weird creatures, you humans are.” I smirked, he was calling us weird creatures?

“Strange ideas, you humans have. Teleported through your toothbrush, I did.”

I scoffed. My idea was strange? Teleporting wasn’t?

“Back to the main point? Why are you here?” Haley asked, some what rather rudely.

Yoda rolled his eyes and muttered to himself. I could have sworn I heard… ‘Humans. So impatient. Don’t even offer me a drink’

“Would you like a drink?” I asked Yoda. Haley threw me a look that asked if I was crazy. Moments ago, I had thought that I was.

“Green Tea, you have?” Yoda asked.

I shook my head, “No. Sorry.”

Yoda threw his hands in the air, “Humans! Never have anything good, they don’t.”

“Why. Are. You. Here?!” Haley shouted. I winced, she had a very short temper and I could tell she was almost past the point of impatience.

Yoda held his hands up at her, “Alright. Alright. A need to yell, there isn’t! Rude, Human.”

He took a deep breath.

“Yoda is here because, wished for a million wishes, one of you did.”

I swallowed, nervously. That was me. I had been struggling with my Math homework last night and wished I had a million wishes so that I could use one of them on finding the answers.

“That was me,” I said.

Yoda curtsied at me, “Well, granted your request has been, Miss Ruby.”

I laughed nervously. “I no longer require those wishes, so you are free to go.”

Yoda gasped loudly and gave me a shocked look. You would think I had suggested we light him on fire.

“No, Miss, understand you do not. Stay until ALL the wishes have been granted, Yoda must.” He added emphasis to the all.

Haley threw her hands in the air, “Oh. Nice one, Ruby!”

I glared at her. How was I to know that this would happen. I knew one thing, Yoda could not stay here. If Mum and Dad saw him they would either, think they were going crazy or report him to the police who would think they were crazy. What had I gotten myself into?

“Why are you granting wishes?” I asked Yoda, hoping to side-track him until I could figure out what to do.

“Trying out a new thing the directors of Star Wars are. Wish for wishes people often do.”

Haley and I nodded.

“Why did you come though? Why not your grandfather?” Haley asked.

“Far too old to be using teleporting, Grandfather is. Sent instead, Yoda was.”

Suddenly I knew what to do, “I wish that I never wished for one million wishes.”

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